Today IT Wasn't In Me
Mood:  lazy
Topic: Marathon
Why am I doing a marathon?? I asked myself that question once this morning while I was out trying to finish eleven miles, and luckily I heard myself say it, and I answered it immediately with ten reasons. My favorite was, "Because I can." Still, the run was awful.

The alarm went off at 5:10 a.m., but my neck was stiff and I'm having my period so my lower back hurt, and I didn't relish the idea of running around the neighborhood with my socks filling up with blood. (When I first started long distance cycling, I asked Mary, a former professional triathlete, how women dealt with their period in sports where blisters caused by friction were an issue, and her response was, "You wear a tampon and get used to seeing your own blood. You're an athlete." Somehow, I don't think my neighbors would quite see it that way.) I considered skipping the run altogether, but then I reminded myself that stress could easily change the date of my cycle, and there was every possibility that I would also be having my period on the day of the marathon. I have promised myself that I will train for every circumstance.... Somehow I finally dragged myself out of bed at 6:00, still feeling exhausted from the week I've had. I had to invoke the 5-Minute Promise I used to use to get myself to the pool--I have to dress and begin my workout, and if 5 minutes into it, I really want to quit, I am allowed to do that. I have only actually quit one time that I can recall.

I did a few sun salutations to stretch out my neck and hips, and I was out the door by 6:15 because I didn't bother with breakfast. My goal was to do 11 miles any way I could, but the Jeff Galloway 4:40 time goal people (NOT me) were supposed to do 3-4x1 miles (11 miles total) this weekend, and since I haven't done any continuous running miles yet (I have been doing only timed intervals), I thought I'd see if I could crank out even one 4x1 mile set.

I walked a half-mile to warm up, then set out at the slowest jog possible, and was amazed to find that I could finish a mile without walking. So then I walked a tenth of a mile and jogged another mile. They were incredibly slow miles, but I proved to myself that I can do them. By the time I'd finished two, the dogs in the townhouses on the half-mile loop I was running were beginning to wake up and bark at me, so I decided to spread the aggravation I caused over a larger area, and went back to running intervals.

Until the end of mile seven, the 60% intervals (3 minute run, 2 minute walk) that were so difficult on Thursday were now easy. Then, I lost my rhythm and started finding it difficult to maintain even a jog on my uphill portions. I had to continually push myself to keep going because I'd lost all interest in being out there. The amazing thing was that there was no foot pain and no coughing or wheezing, and my overall posture was better. Today it seemed the weak link were the backs of my thighs; I really need to add in a bike workout.

Accomplishments:

Finished 11 miles for the first time since the Seattle Half-Marathon in December, 2002;

Ran 2 individual miles continuously;

Moved up to 60% running;

Lost four pounds this week, bringing me to my first weight-loss goal of 10% of my beginning body weight.

Scary Discovery:

The sweat pouring off my forehead was rust colored! Hans always wondered why my white T-shirts end up brown.

Motivational Tool to Remember:

When I wanted to quit today, I remembered Dad who babysits three grandchildren even when he's in pain so bad he can barely walk and who, along with Mom, spent all day yesterday with me and Hans looking over the new house and getting the contract started even though what he really needed was to be resting. And then I remembered Mom who works herself to death in the service of everyone else and takes no time and has nothing left for herself.